Betting Against Juliet

JULIET: “What’s in a name? that which we call a rose
By any other name would smell just as sweet.”

HOMER SIMPSON: “Not if you called them stink weeds.”

Perhaps there is more power in names than we realize.

I’ve decided to apply this insight to my New Year’s Resolution to start getting along with my wife’s cats. Nia and I are doing fine, so I’ve decided to start working on Ms. Hates Everyone.

The first step?

I’ve decided to stop calling her “Ms. Hates Everyone,” and I’ve started calling her by a new nickname: “Ms. Meowzers.”

Why “Ms. Meowzers?”

Certainly I don’t expect her to start caring about me.

She hates everyone.

But ‘Ms. Meowzers’ does remind me of Inspector Gadget (known for his catchphrase “Wowzers”), which was one of my favorite cartoons growing up. So “Ms. Meowzers” is a positive association for me that allows me to look at “Ms. Hates Everything” with something approaching affection.

So far as I can tell, the only reason to have a pet is so that you can express affection for it by saying things like “Hi Ms. Meowzers!” and “Who’s a little Ms. Meowzers?”

So I’m going to give it my best.

That’s what resolutions are about.

I’m betting against Juliet and using the power of names to trick myself into not hating Ms. Meowzers.


4 Responses to “Betting Against Juliet”

  1. Great theory!!! I sure hope it works. And, FYI, just in case you are interested, all the old Inspector Gadget series are offered on the instant watch list on Netflix! (I subject my kids to them all the time. Beats the tar out of Dora anyday!)

  2. I respect your commitment to becoming friends with your wife’s cats, but it’s not really call. It’s up to the cats, and, frankly, if they wanted to be friends with you, you’d know it by now. :-)

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